As much as I believe you have a new opportunity to change or start something new at any given moment, there really is something special about a new year that is liberating.
Its like, we are given this opportunity to compartmentalize all of the bullshit that happened in the past 365 days and leave it in this magical, mystical box of ‘last year’ in order to start a fresh, unwritten 365 more days.
All of the misfortune, heartache, and brokenness can be left behind and you can start afresh. It’s like shedding a layer of skin that has served its purpose.
2017 started off as many others before it had, with a raging hangover and a day wasted on the couch. Maybe that’s what set the precedent for the year. A great time but not without it’s consequences?
2017 was a relatively hard for me. There was a lot of uncertainty, hurt, confusion and questioning that carried throughout the majority of the year. But despite the negative aspects, there was so much to be happy about. I realised the amazing support network I have around me in Melbourne and saw this as a silver lining of a shitty situation.
Three weddings, four overseas trips, no where to call home for 4 weeks with all of my belongings in rubbish bags, breast augmentation, moving house, meditation, learning to forgive, making new friends, strengthening existing friendships, yoga, heartache, 3 different gyms, 3 training styles, photography, a lot of laughing, surgery recovery, nights out, nights in, bought a car, promotion, listening, online shopping, learning, resting, training, vegetarianism, falling back in love with reading, time out, beach walks, girls weekends, smashed avo, cleanse of coffee, fights, making up, sex, standing up for myself but also letting myself get walked over.
However, 2017 I feel was very much a year of giving. Giving my time and my energy and myself to other people. Doing things for others to make them happy at the expense of my own peace. Being there for those around me more than I have been for myself. Having other’s best interests in mind that dictate my actions rather than what I need or want. Letting myself be second best and not standing up for myself.
I have been needed by people around me and am content with the fact that I am selfless and caring enough to give my time when it’s needed and won’t stop doing so.
But 2018 is the year that I need to be first. If something is draining my energy more than it’s adding to it, I don’t need it in my life. If something does not align with my worth or makes me feel uneasy or forced, I will not do it. I will give to myself before I give to others. But I will also give to myself so I can give to others.
It’s only when you are overflowing with love and abundance that you can give to those around you. It’s like a teacup with water in it. If the cup is only half full, you need to drain out the rest of the water to give to others, leaving it empty. But if you focus on filling the teacup up with water, it will get so full and overflow water onto the saucer. Only then can you give your love and time to others, the overflow, when you have filled your teacup to the brim.
2018 I have planned to volunteer in Cambodia. Something I have wanted to do for the past 6 years and have put it off because I have always come up with an excuse. I want to travel and experience things outside of my comfort zone to expand to another level. I want to have fun and do things for myself and not restrict myself to the limitations of others. I want to write more and expand my knowledge. Get back in touch with my creative side, focus on performance training (CrossFit cult has already been joined joined), continue to succeed in my career, save and make sure that if I am not happy, do something to change it.
It doesn’t need to be a new year to make these changes but a fresh start sure as hell does help kick you into gear.
Starting a fresh year gives you the time to reflect on the lessons and triumphs of the year that has been. Change will only come when you implement the small habits daily and I find it so important not to live the same year, every year and call it a life.
If you are not growing, you’re dying. So as long as you’re growing, learning, evolving, making mistakes and trying new things, you are living.
This is a year I do what makes me happy. I have spent so much time focusing on bettering myself that sometimes you forget to have fun in the process.