health

The curse of Altruism

Do you ever feel like sometimes you’re living a life that isn’t yours?

I know that seems dire, but hear me out.

I do a lot for the people I love. I absolutely hate, and I mean, hate, people going out of their way for me, so I make it my mission to make their lives as easy as possible, despite what this means for me.

I listen more than I speak. I give more than I take. I accommodate everyone’s convenience as a result of jeopardizing my own. I give help more than I receive it and ask how people are more than I am asked.

I find myself giving other’s needs and problems precedence over my own.

And to be quite honest with you, recently it has been draining.

It’s no-ones fault but my own but it’s just a part of who I am and I love that I am altruistic.

But this month I have little energy left for myself because it’s consumed by everyone else and BOY have I felt it.

I love helping others. I love spending time with the people I love but I’ve come to realise that if I don’t start putting myself first, there won’t be anything left for anyone, let alone for me.

Sometimes, when you are the ‘go-to’ person you start to wear the weight of their worlds. And the more that is dumped on you without a release, the more you start to get worn down.

Feeling like you’re constantly listening to other’s peoples hardship without being asked “how are you?” is tiring and honestly, sometimes disengaging.

But this week I have taken some time to myself and focused on what I want to do, regardless of what other people want from me.

I’ve taken long walks by myself, sat in a cafe with an almond milk cappuccino (standard) in my own company, had a facial and have watched The Bacherlorette after a long day. They may not be groundbreaking actions but they have been groundbreaking for my mood and livelihood.

It is SO easy to get wrapped up in other people’s lives, especially with social media and the amount of information we are fed in today’s world. I think it is as important as ever to get in tune with how you’re feeling and act in a way that is beneficial to you.

Take some time out to give back to yourself for some R&R, whatever that means to you, because you need to give to yourself first before you can to others.

Stacie x

 

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